Wednesday, May 26, 2010

90 Degrees

Having a dog has made me thankful for the little things - like a green garden hose spewing cold water on a hot humid day. Simon sees the hose, and it's like Christmas to him.

Hope you're staying cool!

Monday, May 24, 2010


For those of you that watch Oprah, you know EXACTLY what the title means.

If you're a non-Oprah lover, please allow me to explain:

It's Saturday. You just rolled out of bed. You realize you're out of milk, you need to grab your dry cleaning, and you haven't bought a gift yet for the wedding shower you're attending on Sunday - which is tomorrow. You throw on a pair of baggy sweats or cargo pants or gym pants coupled with a t-shirt and head for the door. You stop briefly in the hallway mirror to throw on a pair of sunglasses and throw your hair into some concoction that kind of resembles your garden variety pony tail. You jump in the car and quickly look into the rear view mirror.

"Ugh geesh. I look awful." You think of that 3rd glass of wine you had the night before that you could have totally gone without. Brian usually stops me at 2. Sometimes I listen. Usually I don't - and wish that I had.

At this point we reach for the lip gloss because lip gloss will somehow pull this ensemble together so we don't look like a complete and utter disaster. We brush a few fly away hairs back only to watch them pop back up again, and back out of the driveway.

"Just today," we think to ourselves, "I got to get out and get my stuff done."

But somehow "today" has turned into "every time I leave the house to go somewhere other than work." Don't get me wrong, at 21 I could pull off this look. At 21, you could pull off this look.

At 32, you're officially a Shlumpadinka. At 32, I'm officially a Shlumpadinka.

I realized yesterday, while impatiently waiting at the deli counter in the supermarket, that I have indeed officially veered from my old stunning and hip self, and slammed head on into looking like a bag lady (no offense to bag ladies as most are wonderful people). I stood there, tightly holding my little pink ticket watching the deli engineers maneuver around at a snail's pace. I caught myself mentally tearing apart the girl standing in front of me.

"Good God," I thought to myself, "THAT is a disastrous pedicure. Ugh, and the bra straps hanging out, seriously? It's called racer back bra honey. Buy one. And the roots? That look went out with 80's Madonna. Time to pay a visit to the salon."

And then a little voice chimed in. It was very faint and very reluctant to speak up.

"Um, I don't mean to interrupt your uncalled for yet entertaining internal dialogue regarding this poor innocent stranger just trying to get her deli meats like the rest of us, but I can't help asking - have YOU looked in a mirror lately?"

And that's when it hit me. Here I stood in a pair of beige velor track suit pants, a white long sleeved t-shirt, flip flops, no makeup, greasy haired ponytail, and a black head band tying this whole God awful get-up together. I was mortified to realize that the girl with the awful pedicure and bad hair didn't look any better or worse than I did at that very moment.

So I've decided to add an additional resolution to the 10 I'm already (miserably failing) working on accomplishing this year.

No more Shlumpadinka. On that note, I'm off to iron the shirt and pants that I'm wearing to work today, because I've realized that although I'm usually put together when going to work, a small degree of Shlumpadinka-ness is creeping into my work appearance as well......

Friday, May 14, 2010


Every night, right before blissful slumber overcomes my body, I ponder what I did and did not accomplish for the day.

Every night I realize 24 hours in a day just isn't enough. Between work, housework, errands, working out, catching up, spending time with loved ones, spending time with loved pets - I can't seem to find a happy balance of what needs to be done, and what can wait.

At the moment my kitchen table is overridden with clutter that needs to be put in it's rightful place. My master bathroom is half painted with paint supplies strewn haphazardly all over the floor. An overflowing basket of laundry sits untouched in my bedroom. My down comforter is naked because I haven't washed it's duvet. I haven't washed the duvet because once I wash it, it will have to be ironed. I don't feel like ironing. Dust bunnies comprised of a combination of cat hair and dog hair roll by like tumbleweeds. Work emails need to be sent. Personal emails need to be sent. The bathtubs aren't disgusting - but aren't necessarily gleaming clean like I prefer them to be. My car has remnants of sand in the backseat from the dog park I took Simon to the other day after work. I haven't been to the gym since Monday. I have clothes to return that I probably can't return now because it's been over a month. I need to call the vet to discuss Ebenezer's chronic urinary issues. We haven't done anything in regards to wedding planning/saving/discussing.....


Does it ever end?

All of these things make me feel bad. It doesn't help that I'm a control freak, and I was raised on the motto, "A place for everything, and everything in it's place." Those words play over and over in my mind as I step over my shoes that I didn't put away (that Simon chewed this morning), as I push away a dish on the coffee table, as I stare at a stack of mail that needs to be sorted through.

I force myself to stop. STOP thinking of these things that in the grand scheme of things are not important.

My messy kitchen table isn't a big deal. What is a big deal is that I have enough family and friends to sit around that table. The laundry on the floor-who cares. We have clothes to wear. Clean clothes. They might be wrinkled, but so what. The animal fur? Lots and lots of animal fur means that my beloved pets are home and loved and show us love. As I write this, Simon is chasing a rolling ball of fur across the kitchen floor. He is happy. I am happy. All the correspondence to keep up with - phone calls, emails, BLOGGING - means I have people to correspond with, and that I am never alone.

Happy Friday :)