Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Crazy Weirdo Student Girl

I have a great group of men and women that take my spin class.  I absolutely love, love, LOVE my small, but faithful and dedicated, spin following. We laugh, tell jokes, share stories - it's wonderful!

I'm kind of famous in a very small and insignificant way.

Once in awhile I get a transient weirdo that decides to take my class for a few weeks then thankfully disappears.  Don't get me wrong - I do have "regular" weirdos, but I've learned their quirks and have actually grown to love and appreciate them.

Weirdos need love too.

Like this one guy - who may or may not have some sort of mental instability - that comes in and tells me about every marathon he has run, when he is running his next one, what he plans on doing over the weekend, what he did the previous weekend and sometimes tells me everything he has eaten that day, EVERY TIME HE COMES TO CLASS.  Sometimes, when he really gets into the class, he sings along with the music which sounds like a monotone hummmmmmmmmmmmmm. He is a sweet man and has grown on me because he is harmless and kind and shakes my hand or high fives me at the end of class and is nice and courteous with the other students.

Or this other guy that sits in the front row and does his own thing at his own pace.

The entire class.

For the last 4 years.

Whatev, he doesn't bother me either. Harmless weirdo, that's all.

But once in awhile a true weirdo comes along that irks the f*ck out of me.

Case in point - there is a 20-something Korean girl (not that her being Korean matters, I'm just trying to paint a mental image here) that is a little on crazy weirdo side. 

For example - sometimes at the end of class, a student will come up to me to talk about something that isn't necessarily private, but is still a conversation between the two of us. I was chatting with one student about her job at a local real estate office and I began asking questions about property in the area when crazy weirdo student girl butted in and said, "So, you want to move?"

Again, the conversation wasn't private, but it was between this other student and myself.  I simply looked at her and said, "No, just asking some questions."

This crazy weirdo student girl will linger at the end of every class and insert herself into any conversation that I may be having with a student that isn't her.

F*cking weird.

I've mentioned in other posts that my classroom is small and consists of 14 bikes. My class is popular so it is necessary to sign a sign up sheet at the front desk in order to secure a spot in class.

If you're not on the list, you don't get a bike. Simple right?

So a few months back, on a full night, crazy weirdo student girl barged in as I was about to start class and crazily asked, "are you full?"

I told her I was, apologized, told her to try next again next week, and proceeded to start my class since it was like 5:59.

Crazy weirdo student girl started to tear up (yes, as in cry) and then went into this panic rant:

"It's not fair for students that come every week to not get a bike, when people who don't come every week can just decide to show up and they get a bike and they're not here all the time, and I'm HERE every week and it's not fair...."

Blah, blah, blah.

She went on and on and on and I kept trying to apologize while shooing her out the door but she wouldn't back down.

I finally had to sternly say, "It's past 6. I need to start class."

I gave crazy weirdo student girl the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she had a bad day. Maybe she has PMS. Maybe her dog died. Maybe her boss is a dick.  I figured she had some sort of underlying reason to almost break down in tears over the lack of spin bikes on a Wednesday night.

I mean really.

So fast forward to tonight.  Class is full and I'm about to start when the spin room door whips open and crazy weirdo student girl frantically stumbles in.


"Yes," I reply, "I'm sorry, if you haven't signed in, then there aren't any bikes available."

Now, a normal person would be disappointed, but would gracefully bow out of class and try again next week.

Not crazy weirdo student girl.

She starts pointing to two new girls in the front row and begins to raise her voice.

"People just decide that they're going to take a spin class and they come and take up the bikes and people like ME, who are here every week don't get a bike. It's NOT FAIR!"

Again, the almost tears, and the "it's not fair," and the raised voice.

This b*tch had worked my last nerve.

Luckily (for her) one of my wonderful regulars, who had planned to leave class early, gave up his bike so that crazy weirdo student girl could stay. 

I'm really wishing he hadn't offered up his bike because I was really looking forward to asking her and her craziness to get the f*ck out, but alas, apparently tonight wasn't my night for confrontation.

Next week might be an entirely different story......


  1. Homegirl is a grown ass woman.

  2. OMG... how embarrassing for her! Cra-zy!

    BTW, I'm really LOVING the daily posts! Keep 'em coming!! xo