Roses Are Red....Violets Are Blue....

Guess who just turned 32!?

Yup. It's me.

When asked about my age, I usually tell people I'm 29. I figure it's a teeeeeny tiny little lie that in the grand scheme of things most likely WON'T aid in sending me to hell in a handbag.

I have to admit - turning 32 was kind of scary. I don't chronologically feel 32, and if I had my way, I'd subtract 3-5 years. On the flip side, I love what being in my 30's feels like. I finally feel...normal. Don't get me wrong, my twenties were super fun and unpredictable and adventurous. But under all that fun lied low self esteem, self loathing, awful choices, and bad relationships. I never felt quite right. Pressure to be successful, pressure to be thin & beautiful, pressure to be marrrrrrrrrried.

I really think it's the pressure to get married that kept me in awful, going absolutely nowhere, relationships.

30 feels grounded and secure and logical and wise. Things that bothered me or provoked a negative response back in my 20s don't even phase me now. I can't determine if it's because I don't have the time to deal with petty crap, or because I've learned from past mistakes.

If I could create a time machine and travel back in time to meet up with my twenty-something self, I would offer the following advice:

1) Enjoy the journey. Every step of the journey. Enjoy the Friday nights in your dump apartment eating mac&cheese with your roommates, & dancing to old school rap. Enjoy not having to answer to anyone about where you're going, who you're going with and when you'll be back. Enjoy your friends, and every minute that you spend with them, because although they will most likely be your friends forever, you'll never be as close as you are now.

2) Value yourself more. Don't allow anyone to decrease your value. You can't expect anyone else to put you on a pedestal, you have to climb up there all by yourself. Climb up there - it's worth it.

4) Laugh. Love the laughing. Remove anyone from your life that causes you more tears than laughter.

5) Relax. Relax about the future. Relax about your job. Relax about meeting the right person. Trust the process. Trust yourself. Trust that inner voice that tells you something just isn't right. You'll figure it out. It all works itself out.

Happy Birthday to me :)

Laughing Out Loud

I saw this commercial while reluctantly watching football with Brian over the weekend.

I hysterically laughed, just shy of snorting, as Brian rolled his eyes and annoyingly stated, "It's not THAT funny."



Yeah. It is.

Happy Monday.

Me Likey....

Me Wanty....



But for $360 I think I'll have to pass-y.

I do have some weddings coming up: June, July and September. Would that make it a justified purchase? A "must have" if you will.

I mean, if you guys say so, then I'll just have to buy it.....sooooooooo say so.

Thanks.

Tools Of The Trade

My path to kitchen discovery has been riddled with excitement and new purchases.

I LOVE new purchases!

I figured that if I was going to attempt this whole cooking thing, and succeed at it, I was going to need some tools to aid in my pursuit.

First things first. Where to start? What to cook? It almost seemed like a message from above when I came across this book during an errand to my local wholesale superstore:



I flipped through this publication and was excited to discover that I could most likely successfully execute the majority of the recipes listed. I was excited to start, but felt that the book was naked. It needed something. So on a different errand to my local Crate & Barrel I purchased this:



So now that I knew what I was cooking and my brand new book was no longer naked, I needed to focus on what to wear whilst I'm doing the cooking. Thanks to Mom for this fabulous Christmas gift:



And yes, in case you were wondering, this ensemble includes BOTH leopard and giraffe prints. Stylish I know, but please don't be jealous.

And finally, this is me attempting my very first recipe of 2010: steak burgers with shoestring fries accompanied by a garlicky dijon mayo sauce. And beer. Except I didn't make the beer; I just poured it.



I managed to NOT burn the house down or chop anything off my body. A success in my book!

And yes, it was delicious. Brian even says so!

I'm Evil. And I Like It.

My Monday night SPIN class was packed - a sign that I wasn't the only woman that has set out to lose a part of herself for the New Year. All of the bikes were taken, and I actually had to turn women away and encourage them to arrive earlier next week in order to secure a bike.

The women that had secured a bike had no idea what they were about to get themselves into as I proceeded to beat the hell out of them for an hour. I don't think they realize that the dirty looks work against them - with each angry glare from the back row, with each eye roll, with each heavy "this b*tch is crazy" sigh, I am forced to push you harder - because you asked for it....because I'm enjoying watching you suffer, and sweat, and hate my very existence.

I've had this discussion many times with my sister:

"Ugh, I would so hate you if I were taking your class. You're such an evil b*tch."

I realize that my approach doesn't work for everyone. Some people aren't motivated by loud hard bumping music, and an instructor telling them "quit being lazy, you can do this," but it's what works for me.

When I'm the student instead of the teacher, and I hear the instructor float the word "lazy" or the phrases, "work harder," "you can do this," and "challenge yourself," I start an internal dialogue with myself:

"I can do this, I am being lazy, I know I can push myself harder." And then I do. When I get home, I thank the evil SPIN instructor for pushing me to work harder because I have trouble pushing myself.

If you want to be coddled, have lunch with your Grandmother. If you want to be pushed, and encouraged, and worked hard, then I'll see you on Monday night.