An actual conversation that took place this weekend.
Brian: "Um honey, can you come here?"
Me: "Sure, what's up?"
Brian: "Did you by any chance leave a sopping wet dish towel on the kitchen counter overnight?"
Me: "Ummmmmm. No."
Brian: "I think one of the cats pissed on it."
Me: "Let me see it."
That is when I picked up the dish cloth and gave it a very quick sniffity sniff.
Why - you may ask - would I be smelling the urine soaked dish towel?
Being the mom of a special needs kitty has forced me to learn of all his little quirks as they pertain to the kitty box. I need to be very aware of his actions in order to be on the look out for any issues he might be having. I know his box patterns - he urinates after dinner but poops before it. He holds his breath briefly before he pees, and the smell - WOWZERS - is some of the smelliest most potent kitty pee you could ever smell.
The kitchen dish towel stunk of cat pee but not the horrid smell that Ebenezer leaves behind.
Me: "This was Mia. She must be mad at us."
Brian: "She's such a bitch."
I don't know what is worse - the fact that Mia urinated on my kitchen counter, or the fact that I knew it was her based on the smell.
Brian and I pieced together the sequence of events we figure led up to the counter pissing incident. We are well aware that our animals do strange things in the middle of the night because we find random evidence the next morning. A lone shoe left in the middle of the carpet. A pile of clear vomit with shreds of green plant throughout (Mia likes to nibble the houseplants even though they make her throw up. Every. Single. Time). A cat toy that was once upstairs now downstairs. Items from the kitchen table left in the laundry room. We know they play at night and we've actually been awakened by Simon's barking only to find he has cornered Mia on the kitchen counter with her having nowhere to go but down - straight into Simon's slobbery mouth.
We THINK that he may have cornered her up there again and she either a) pissed herself and the dishtowel because Simon scared her, or b) she was angry that she was trapped on the counter and urinated to let us know just how angry she was. For those of you who don't speak fluent cat like I do - inappropriate urination or defecation is done for 1 of 2 reasons.
1) The cat is sick
2) The cat is trying to tell you something that could range from, "hey my litter box needs to be cleaned," to "I loathe your new boyfriend." Or, "I hate this freaking dog."
So yeah. That's what we think happened.
Desire for another cat - gone.