I've been completely missing in action lately mainly because I've been a big ball of stressed out highly confrontational energy. Although I'm fighting very hard to stay positive and fight off the negative energy, I'm having a hard time staying chipper. Increased responsibilities at work, wedding planning, and MOUNTING bills have me teetering on the edge of a crying fit/tempter tantrum at any given moment during the day. In addition I'm a total stress eater - so when the going gets tough, I usually get a hot fudge sundae. The chocolate high makes me feel better, but since I'm watching what I eat I can't reach for the fudge resulting in added stress because, gosh darn it, I JUST WANT SOME CHOCOLATE GOODNESS!
I attempt to convince myself that these are "happy times," and for split seconds at a time I actually feel just that - happy and excited that the wedding is 10 weeks away. Then my mind switches to the virtual "to do" list I have streaming in my mind, and my good mood fades to "HOLY CRAP HOW DO I GET IT ALL DONE!?!?!"
I had a "mini" breakdown last night as I perused wedding magazines in search of some last minute ideas. Poor Brian had to console my sobs at 11:30 pm as I whined and sniffled for the most ridiculous reasons....
"What if it isn't perfect!! I still haven't figured out what to do with my hair. Veil, no veil? I don't know what to do! I still have to make my hair and makeup appointment and PROGRAMS! What are we going to do about programs?! I have to call the DJ and we need to plan the ceremony and the rings! We need rings......"
On and on and on I ranted while Brian contemplated whether to hug me or jump out the window and make a run for it. In my defense, I am premenstrual (TMI?) which means I have zero control over my thoughts, emotions, and feelings.
I plan on taking some time over the weekend to get organized. I'm usually pretty good with this kind of stuff but the stress of it all has made me procrastinate. At 10 weeks out - the procrastination has got to stop.
So any advice? Any words of wisdom to make THIS part of the planning process easy and enjoyable and most importantly not stressful.
Anyone, anyone?
Oh lady I wish i could say I have wonderful advice...sad thing is I'm struggling with it as much as you are! And we don't have 10 weeks but 10.5 months left. Planning a wedding 4 states away was probably not our greatest idea.
ReplyDeleteAnd the cravings? Yeahhhh that was me last night. I ate waaaay too many cheez-its and then felt gross because I haven't worked out in like, a week. Not getting enough sleep is not helping me at all.
I'm also hoping to get some stuff going this weekend (In a calm fashion, I hope).
Best of luck, lady! I'm sorry I don't have any advice - I'm just bitching along with you. But I know that although you're stressing about things, it will all come together in the end. I always read to "ask for help" so maybe try getting your sister/friends in with helping some tasks???
I remember how planning a wedding was equal parts exciting and stressful! To put things in perspective, perhaps you can try to keep in mind when you're planning the wedding, that just as love makes us see imperfect people perfectly....even if your wedding day isn't "perfect," its still YOUR day and you'll be married to the love of your life at the end of that day.... and that will make it perfect : ) Just take it one step at a time and take deeeep breaths.
ReplyDeleteA friend of mine is married to a minister. Something he said once repeats itself in my mind from time to time....he said "Do not worry, do....If there is nothing to do, don't worry." It makes sense and might make you feel better if you repeat it enough. Good Luck!
Calm, Down.
ReplyDeletePrincess, I think you should focus on the big details and if that's all in place, the little things are just added extras. If your programs aren't done in time, it isn't a big deal. Your wedding will still be beautiful and memorable without them. Veil? Also not a big deal, I'm sure you will look gorgeous no matter what. Don't sweat the small stuff, I am sure it will be perfect no matter what. :)
ReplyDeleteA good cry helps a lot. My motto is - Everything will look better in the morning. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's been proven that at that time in our lovely little {massively frightening} cycle we feel the weight of the world. I completely 100% can relate to this because as you were typing this . . . I was feeling the same way. It's scary and I often find myself asking myself, "WHY CAN'T YOU DO IT ALL!" I often have so many things to do in my mind that I hit a point where I just can't keep up with my own self. It doesn't matter how organized I am or how dialed in or automated I've got my system. At that point in the month, nothing is right and everything is wrong. IT'S WEIRD!
ReplyDeleteI've learned and this is through having a circle of wise women of all ages to go easier on myself during that time. Because in a few days, you always feel a sense of ahhhhhhhhhh*sigh. It's weird and I feel sorry for anyone who has to deal with us. :) xoxo! Everything will be great, no doubt. Hugs.