Monday, October 18, 2010


I had an extremely interesting conversation Saturday night accompanied by delicious pink cosmos.

Brian and I ventured into Boston to visit a friend's new bar. After about two strong drinks, I managed to build up enough courage to ask a question I've been dying to ask here - I figured I'd start with a table full of people, mostly couples, and then report my findings.

" often do you guys have sex? What's the norm?"

The proverbial record skipped.

Interestingly enough, after about a 3 second pause at the table where I was secretly wishing I hadn't asked the question and trying to avoid Brian's dagger stare which conveyed the message "I can't believe you just asked that, we are in public and you are being inappropriate:" the conversation took on a life of it's own, and everyone started to chime in.

I shot Brian back a look as if to say, "See, totally acceptable topic of conversation for a bar, on a Saturday night."

The answers were what I expected. Most quoted about 2-3 times a week, 4 times on a good week.

After the question of frequency was answered, the conversation veered from frequency to content.

*NOTE* I specifically asked about FREQUENCY - the content part had nothing to do with me.

SO - people chimed in with questions such as:
How often is oral given?
How often is it received?
Is cuddling involved?

At this point I'm beaming over the topic that I had introduced which everyone was so willing to chat about. I excitedly listened as accusations flew across the table:

"Um, we don't cuddle."
"Ohhhhhh no, you don't do THAT anymore!"
"Dry humping my leg does NOT count as romance!"
"Your idea of foreplay is so off target."

So.....are you willing to comment? Comment on frequency? Comment on content? Are you happy with the level of "activity?" What would you change? What would you add? Are you willing to admit any grievances, complaints, and or praises?

Because I'm nosy and want to hear all about it :)


  1. Hahahaha. This is hilarious. And totally acceptable. :)

    Want to know the truth? We have not done IT since we found out I was pg. THIS TIME. LOL. But normally on average it's 2-3 times a week.

  2. That is too funny! I don't want to embarrass my hubs by answering. HA!

  3. You are BRAVE!

    I'll just say... More often now that we're married... We are big cuddlers... Romance is sometimes a hot topic (ie one of us wants it, the other doesn't think it's necessary)... Content gets better all the time... And my husband is amazing.

    Now I'm going to point out that YOU didn't give any sordid details about yourself!

  4. I have to post anonymously, because this is something that's hard for us. Although I'm a newlywed, my husband and I have been together for a looong time, and we hit a slump that's been hard for both of us to get out of. For a long time, it was only about once a month. We've been working on it and getting better, but 2-3 times a week seems so far off.


  5. Hi Anonymous,
    Thanks for your honesty! I think I am going to dedicate an entire post to this subject....hopefully it will be helpful...